Jaunary Bulletin: Navigating possibilities

Hello, friends of illustration!

Have you ever felt like it was the absolute worst time to do something and yet also the absolute best? If so, welcome to the club.

This is where I properly welcome you to my whole blog anyway! :D Glad you’re here.

I wanted to start writing a monthly newsletter / blog post for a while on top of posting about my career as a freelance illustrator and small business owner on social media, but somehow it took a bit of time as well as the sting of disappointment to get me to actually start. If this also sounds familiar to you read on to learn why I’m now grateful for the trying experience and in what way it kickstarted me. I can’t wait to share things with you in this new, exciting way!

A BLOG IS BORN

It’s January. Need I say more? It’s the first month of the new year and as always an odd mixture of post-christmas lethargy, bad weather melancholy and sense of hopefulness and excitement hangs in the air - because after all this is a chance to start all anew, isn’t it? No matter if you put together an extensive list of New Year’s resolutions or not. But this year, 2022, it’s different, everything is simply...heightened. The melancholy can easily turn into a full-blown depression looking at the state of the world (noone will wonder why) and at the same time hopes become almost painful longings, the little excitements and joys rise in value. People’s pockets are tight, but their hearts are overflowing - and because everyone’s so overwhelmed noone takes the time to leave proper feedback on anything, least of all art. Maybe people don’t want to, maybe they don’t know how to anymore. They just stare, silently. Platforms like Instagram are overrun and overfed. At least that’s how I feel about it right now. What about you? Surely I can’t be the only one! Perhaps we all need a break from that fast consumption and 2 second attention span atmosphere - as inspiring as Instagram can be sometimes. I know I do! That’s why I wanted to write this, no, I knew I had to. This is an open invitation to truly get to know me and my thoughts, but it’s also a chance for me to meet YOU, connect with a close-bonded community of like-minded individuals. (Leave a comment for me under this blog entry if you like, I’d love that!

ON SOCIAL MEDIA FOR ARTISTS

Social media is a fickle friend and follower counts can’t be depended on to show someone’s personal or artistic worth - it sounds so obvious when you read it, you probably find yourself nodding along at this point. But I really had to learn it the hard way and overobsess about these things like I never thought I would; wonder why 50 people unfollowed me shortly after christmas (why did so many individuals suddenly start to „strongly dislike“ my art, and at that magical time of year?) and why most of my original artworks and prints from my last drawing challenge didn’t sell in my Etsy shop even though at the time I posted the drawings people seemed to love them. Guess what: You never know! It’s all trial and error, and so what, my first big art projects as a freelance illustrator were somewhat of a flop (#Mermay, #Peachtober). So what Warner Bros stopped me from selling Harry Potter fanart as bookmarks just when they were starting to become my most sought-after products. So what, some random people I will never meet in my life chose to not care anymore and bots were deleted. Would any of us be sad to see them leave the room in real life? Pretty sure I wouldn’t. It’s those who stay that count, the living breathing people at that. ;)

And yet there I was, feeling disheartened.

I’m almost ashamed of myself, but I feel like it needs to be said, because it’s very easy to get lost in the online art world and after (even during) graduation from art college the internet was pretty much all I had to get my work out there. You’re out for immediate success and the world seems like your oyster, but building a business & a brand takes time (more time than we feel we have), it takes courage and it takes endurance. Some around you will get there faster than you will, others will move slower. But what is „there“ anyway? It’s certainly not a place, it’s rather a feeling, and you decide what it means for you. Maybe I was chasing after the wrong feeling.

THE "FEELING"

Let me eleborate on what Kaspaara’s personal „there“ looks like and what was waiting for me at the point of the learning curve I’m currently at:

I’m not shy, but I am introverted and working like I used to these past months took its toll. I love singing and dancing by myself or with friends very expressively (e.g.), but I don’t overly enjoy performing solo in front of others - which is what you do a lot online, in a way. I love to write into my diary to process my thoughts and come up with theories, to invent stories - not the kind of stories I focused on in 2021 (Instagram, again), which made my forget the real ones. I adore sending out hand-written letters with wax seals to my friends from all over the world instead of sharing every little detail of my life online as „fast food“ just so I stay „active“ and I’m not forgotten on days I don’t post any art. It can be fun, I love photo editing and typography, but it’s mostly meaningless/gone soon and takes a lot of time out of my day.

I’m quite alright with showing my face and I think it’s always lovely to see the person behind the art, so I’m gonna continue showing myself - but talking in front of cameras for YouTube Vlogs causes me big amounts of anxiety and I overthink what I’ll say, it’s not natural to me. I tried a route that worked for artist I admire and found it to be lacking for me. A few things simply need to be adjusted, but I don't think the major shift I have in mind will be noticed as much by others as by myself.

2022 GOALS

Here’s my new plan for this year which I’m sharing with you to keep myself accountable. They are not to be confused with New Year’s resolutions, they’re more of a losely framed business plan. To myself:

Send out letter to House of MinaLima in London (Harry Potter movie graphic art store) and pitch bookmarks (CHECK!)
Focus less on constant social media updates and more on personal artistic growth; post whenever you can. Make big, detailed art, make sketchbook doodles that look horrible and let noone see it if you must, not for content creation. (CHECK!)
Advertise and take on Pet Portrait Commissions (a few slots here and there) CHECK!
Update your whole Portfolio Website so that potential clients see all your work together in one spot (make it simple and convincing at the same time) Personal Website > Instagram (CHECK!)
Finish Tarot Card Project (first 3 cards are my bestseller on Etsy, which I’m really happy about!), as so many people asked for it. Make the 22 cards of the Major Arcana as Endangered Species designs. Pitch cards to a publisher. Do crowdfunding after having completed 6 cards for social media pitch.
Pitch my story „Blizzard“/"Schneesturm" (written and illustrated by me) to several children’s books publishers
Properly start the Girfoo comic account and draw a bi-monthly comics for at least 6 months to see what the response is

FINAL THOUGHTS

To wrap today’s post up, here is that rhetorical question once more: Why do I think it the worst AND best time to start my newsletter on this cloudy last day of January? It’s the worst in one way because I feel like so many things went wrong in my career lately - or didn’t happen at all - that, as an artist who wants to encourage and support other creatives and friends of my work, even aspiring to inspire them... it’s maybe not the best way to pick it up. A lot of things are getting to all of us these days though, things that noone really speaks about in this kind of format - usually. But never fear, it won’t always be this way! That’s why I want to break the silence and speak the truth, unafraid, at the good times as a self-employed artist and the less convenient. Right now it’s the latter, but I’m not thinking of giving up! To anyone who felt like less of an artist lately because of facing financial hardships and lack of interest by „the crowd“: You’re an artist all the more for not letting it hinder you to live your life and just... create. It’s hard, I know it is. But it’s me, it’s you, it’s us! What would the world be without culture in it? Culture needs us to remember it’s worth and our own alongside it.

I stumbled upon this quote by @adamjk on Instagram the other day (it’s available as merch btw, go check him out!) and I hereby want to offer my thanks for this rather perfect closing line (you may read it as a truth and with an amused smile at the same time in this context):

„Do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life work super f*cking hard all the time with no seperations or any boundaries and also take everything extremely personally.“

It’s really all about navigating possibilities and seeing the right ones for your definition of success in life and in work.